Yes, it’s true. I, Holly Gordon, am traveling thousands of miles away, into the depths of Micronesia. To a tiny island – isolated in the North Pacific – hovering vicariously over the Mariana Trench, the very deepest, darkest valley known to the ocean floor.
Okay, so it’s not that treacherous. It’s a US territory located three quarters of the way from Hawaii to the Philippines. The native language is Chamoru, the official language is English and hey! it’s “Where America’s Day Begins!”
From what I’ve learned, Guam is a pretty interesting place. Most of the homes there are made out of cement and rebar, so they – and the occupants inside– survive the violent tropical typhoons. The Jungle in Guam is home to pesky ancient Chamoru spirits – the Taotaomona – who will pinch the hell out of you and leave you covered in painful red welts.
No biggie.
There was quite a bit of destruction on the tiny island during WWII. During the rebuilding process, a creature called the brown tree snake made it’s way over as a stowaway, from Australia or Papua New Guinea. This hungry feller had a heyday, feasting on all the exotic, rare and especially beautiful native birds. The island has been without song ever since.
Guam really is jam-packed with curiosity. Everyone there drives, there’s a university, hospital, breadfruit trees, beautiful beaches, water parks, vampire plants, golf courses, the largest K-Mart in the world, giant African land snails, a WWII tank graveyard, pink sand and lots of barbeques. It’s like a tiny suburbia smack dab in the middle of paradise. I’ve even heard it’s comparably just as gorgeous as Hawaii – except that you have to be super careful of the wild packs of hungry, stray pit bulls.
At least there aren’t as many tourists!
I read a book once about giant prehistoric sharks living in the Mariana Trench, I just think you guys should WATCH OUT!!!
Love the graphics on this post. You should do more web-comicy posts like this, love it. Reminds me of one of my favorites sites (The Oatmeal).
Hah – thanks Adam! I LOVE The Oatmeal.